You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
