I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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