i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
