My nipple is on Facebook.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Is Oprah even human
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
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