thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
