i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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