Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
