Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
