Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
