where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
