Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
