Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
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