does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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