I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize