Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
