Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
