Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize