Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
