i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
