i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
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