Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
