Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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