Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
