To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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