btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
