There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
