i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
sarcasm needs its own font
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize