My first STD was from a foam party
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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