We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
