Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
How many fucks given?
0.12846
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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