so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
