Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
