i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I don't deserve a penis
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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