I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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