96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
