She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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