Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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