when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
