we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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