I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
