i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
