Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
