You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
