a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
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