how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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