I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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