So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Just pee around me
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Randomize
