But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
