so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
