Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize
