apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize