fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize
